Mrs. Swan Vs. The Scammers

Was watching a re-run of MadTV the other day,and realized the character of Mrs. Swann would be the perfect person for scamming the scammers....

My apologies to Mrs. Swan, I'm not as good at this as her character always was, but did try. Send out several e-mails and none of the scammers responded, so I went even more over the top with this one (by the way, Mrs. Swan claimed to be from the same place in the North Pole that Santa Clause was from in one episode, choosing Korea is because Mash was on)

Mrs. Swann wrote:

I WANT TO KNOW ABOUT YOU PUPY. NOBODY ANSWER ME BACK. THEY NO LIKE ME BECAUSE I KOREAN, THEY PREJUDICE. I GOT MONEY AND CAN BUY PUPY, CAN GIVE PUPY GOD HOME!!!!

Scammer wrote: (Ironically, also received an e-mail form this same scammer about a Macaw)

Hello,
Thanks for the mail. Leo is still available for adoption and i am looking for the right family that will spoil him to rotten and give him the love he deserve. Leo is doing well, he is a 100% pure breed. He a little playful guy of 13 weeks old and he is 2.5 lbs and will be 4-6 lbs when fully grown up. lots of toys and running which is his best game, and he is looking for a family that he will have people to play with. He is current on all shots,he is fix housebroken and he is very friendly to kids and loves the company of other pets like cats birds etc. He is already started putty training; Leo will be coming along with all vet documents. All I want from you is to take good care of him and you will have to send me monthly pics of him, so that i can see how he is doing with his new family. I will like to know when you are free to get him?. The adoption fee is 190.00. The reason why I am given him out for adoption is due the bad weather condition here which makes him not to fill like as home and i will not be able to take good care of him. There is also lack of canned dog food here and inadequate vet docs here. So please if you love him and you are willing to help and adopt him just get back so that we can get him ship over to you. . I am presently Here in Cameroon working as a translator in the Unity Place here in Cameroon. I am one of the best translator of the president of Cameroon. So I will be shipping the puppy from here. I don't know if You will be comfortable to get him ship over to the states. If this sounds well then get back so that we can come up with some thing. I was previously located in Minnesota Town Down St. Paul before I got this job in Cameroon. I will like you to get back to me with your full contact address and your phone number if you don't mine and not to forget the closest airport around you that I will be shipping to.

Mrs. Swann wrote back:

YOU SEND PICHER OF PUPY? HOW OLD PUPY? HOW BIG PUPY, PUPY GONA FIT IN MY PURSE? NO, PEOPLE THINK I FROM ASIA SO WE GONNA EAT PUPY, BUT WE NO DO THAT. PUPY IS FOR SPOIL AND LOVE. IT GONA HAVE ALL TOYS AND LITTLE CLOTHS!!!! I GOT 4 PRETTY BEATY NAIL SALOONS AND MAKE GOD MONEY111 PUPY GET EVTHING PUPY WANT!!! PUPY GET BEST FOOD!!! HOW I GET PUPY??? HOW I PAY YOU FOR PUPY??? I GOT CRECID CARD, SEND YOU CREDIT CARD NUMBER YOU SEND PUPY??? I GOT VISA MTRCARD AMEICNEXPRS. YOU JUST SAY WICH YOU WANT

Scammer answered:

Hello,
Thanks for the mail. Leo is still available for adoption and i am looking for the right family that will spoil him to rotten and give him the love he deserve. Leo is doing well, he is a 100% pure breed. He a little playful guy of 13 weeks old and he is 2.5 lbs and will be 4-6 lbs when fully grown up. lots of toys and running which is his best game, and he is looking for a family that he will have people to play with. He is current on all shots,he is fix housebroken and he is very friendly to kids and loves the company of other pets like cats birds etc. He is already started putty training; Leo will be coming along with all vet documents. All I want from you is to take good care of him and you will have to send me monthly pics of him, so that i can see how he is doing with his new family. I will like to know when you are free to get him?. The adoption fee is 190.00. The reason why I am given him out for adoption is due the bad weather condition here which makes him not to fill like as home and i will not be able to take good care of him. There is also lack of canned dog food here and inadequate vet docs here. So please if you love him and you are willing to help and adopt him just get back so that we can get him ship over to you. . I am presently Here in Cameroon working as a translator in the Unity Place here in Cameroon. I am one of the best translator of the president of Cameroon. So I will be shipping the puppy from here. I don't know if You will be comfortable to get him ship over to the states. If this sounds well then get back so that we can come up with some thing. I was previously located in Minnesota Town Down St. Paul before I got this job in Cameroon. I will like you to get back to me with your full contact address and your phone number if you don't mine and not to forget the closest airport around you that I will be shipping to.

Mrs. Swan shouted:

YOU SEND PICHER OF PUPY? HOW OLD PUPY? HOW BIG PUPY, PUPY GONA FIT IN MY PURSE? NO, PEOPLE THINK I FROM ASIA SO WE GONNA EAT PUPY, BUT WE NO DO THAT. PUPY IS FOR SPOIL AND LOVE. IT GONA HAVE ALL TOYS AND LITTLE CLOTHS!!!! I GOT 4 PRETTY BEATY NAIL SALOONS AND MAKE GOD MONEY111 PUPY GET EVTHING PUPY WANT!!! PUPY GET BEST FOOD!!! HOW I GET PUPY??? HOW I PAY YOU FOR PUPY??? I GOT CRECID CARD, SEND YOU CREDIT CARD NUMBER YOU SEND PUPY??? I GOT VISA MTRCARD AMEICNEXPRS. YOU JUST SAY WICH YOU WANT


Scammer responded:

Thanks for the concern bunny. The puppy is 13 weeks old ok. He will get 4-5 lbs when fully grown. Its ok. Please promise me you will take good care of him and you will have to send me monthly pics so that i can see how he is doing with you ok. You will have to send the money using western union money transfer ok.

Mrs. Swann came back with:

HOW COM YOU NO SEND PICHER??? PUPY IS GONA BE SPOIL WILL BE LIK MY BABY. MY EGLISH NOT SO GOD! WHAT IS WESTRN UNON DONT HAVE THAT CREDT CARD. I COLD GET IT



Scammer answered:

I have attached some pics of the puppy to this e-mail. Your English is not that bad but you have to improve on it ok. Western union a store where money can be sent ok. You will need my information or address to take it there to send the money ok. We don't use credit cards in Cameroon ok. So get back for my address to send the money.I will direct you on how to send the money ok. (Oh, the irony, the irony, for a supposed translator to the president, their english SUCKS)

Mrs. Swann wrote:

YOU NO SEND PICHER. I WANA SEE PUPY. HOW COM YOU NO USE CREDT CARD IN CAMERON??? EVBODY USE CREDT CARD!! I BUY SUPPLS FOR SHOP WITH CREDT CARD!!! YOU TELL ME HOW TO SEND MONEY UNION OK!!!! I SEND MONY FOR PUPY BUT YOU SEND PICHR. I WANA SHOW LADES IN SHOP!!!


Scammer answered back:

Bunny i though i did sent you the pics yesterday,but well i have have attached some pics of the puppy to this e-mail. You have to know that Cameroon is not like the states.Its a less develop country how could you expect them to use a credit card??? The only means i can have the money is through western union ok.So if you will need my address to send the money do let me know ok.

Mrs. Swann wrote:

OH, PRETY PUPY!!! I GOT NEW PURSE PUPY FIT IN!!!! YOU TELL ME HOW USE UNION I SEND MONEY!!!! WHAT YOU ADRES????? YOU TELL ME HOW MUCH MONEY TO SEND!!! PUPY SO PRETY!!! I SHOW PICHER TO LADES, THEY BE JALOS!!!

Scammer Wrote Back:

Thanks for the e-mail.You will be sending 290.00 ok. This will
include 2 large cage,food and toys ok.You will be sending the money
through western union with the following address. You will have to copy the information in bold on a peace of paper and take it to any western union store around you ok. Tell the services there that you want to send money and they will tell you what to do ok.
Receivers Names,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,Linda Kimbely
Country,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,Cameroon.
Zip Code,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,237
City,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,Younde
Apt # 456 Bastos Avenue
Phone Number,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,+237-9404-7210.
Test Question................................Who
Test Answer,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,Linda
As soon as you send the money do let me know ok.You will have to
get back to me with the MTCN thats the money transfer control number
and the senders names ok. I will be waiting.
NB: I will like to know how long will you take to send the money?????

Mrs. Swann answered:

I send money today!!!

Scammer Answered:

Bunny as soon as you come back do e-mail the MTCN thats the money transfer control number and the senders names.


At this point, I pretty much got bored with the exchange and ended it by writing her and stating that the Western Union Official had informed me she was a scammer.